Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Feeling Overwhelmed

There is really nothing new to report.  Everything is status quo, which is a good thing, I guess.  I am about half-way through this cycle, which is a rest cycle, so our IVF cycle will be here before we know it. 

So this morning, the pharmacy called me about my IVF meds and initially I was excited because things are progressing.  The rep was so sweet and wished me lots of luck with my cycle.  How nice of her!  Sometimes just a little bit of support from even a complete stranger is what keeps my spirits up....it is such a great feeling to know that we have people cheering us on. Once I got off the phone with the rep, I went through the list of medications I will be taking/injecting/sticking up in my lady parts or whatever, and I felt really overwhelmed.  Unfortunately, they didn't include any valium or some sort of sanity pill in this order ;o)  Has it really come to this? This is really going to happen and I guess I am in a bit of denial about it.  Pretty funny that in the back of my head I think, "what if we get pregnant on our own this cycle and I don't need the meds that we just bought"? That would be amazing, but I am being realistic. 

I haven't told many people in real life that we made the decision to move to IVF.  I really just don't feel like listening to how much they can relate because it took them 2 months to conceive or how their next door neighbor stopped all treatment and got pregnant when she stopped trying.  I just don't have the energy to educate the ignorant.  Prior to having to deal with secondary infertility, I was ignorant too.....what I wouldn't give to still be that person.  **sigh**

I am looking forward to this weekend BIG TIME!  My brother and sister-in-law are taking Beans overnight, so Mr. Lovey Pants and I can have a date night.  Beans is so excited to spend the night with her aunt and uncle, but mostly with her baby cousin.  Mommy and Daddy are super excited too!  We are going out to dinner and then meeting up with friends for cocktails.  I am labeling this my "last night out"...hopefully until a little more than 9 months from now.

Until next time....xoxoxo

2 comments:

  1. I think that you and Mr. Lovely Pants are being really brave and realistic about your situation. Obviously what you're going through isn't abnormal since there's doctors, specialists, medications, and procedures for you to use in order to get pregnant. I know you love your family and value their opinions, but I think you're making the right decision by not fully including them on all the details. In the end you have to do what's right for you, Mr. Lovely Pants, and Beans. Keep staying positive! I'm rooting for you and I know so many other people are as well!

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  2. Thanks for the support lovey. It truly means a lot xoxo

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